KIDZCOOLIT EXCLUSIVE – Hag & Con have a chat with Dennis The Menace!!!
What’s the coolest Birthday present you were ever given? Hag age 11
Dennis says: It’s definitely the present I’m going to get this year! It’s a tank, it has motorised tracks so it can go anywhere AND it has a massive peashooter instead of a gun. You can load six different kinds of peas into it: stink peas, ink peas, splat peas, smoke peas, itchy peas, slippy peas, sticky peas and giggle peas.
I’m bound to get it because I’ve been really, really good since… since… well, about breakfast time!
If you could change the Red and Black of your jumper – what colours would you choose and why? Hag age 11
Dennis says: Change my jersey? That’s crazy talk, Hag! Do I have to?
Hag: Yeah, go on!
Dennis says: Oh, all right! If I really, really had to change my red and black jersey, I’d change it to a black and red! But then no-one would recognise me. Hey, maybe that’s not a bad idea!
What would you look like if you were a robot? Con age 8
Dennis says: I would be totally amazing! I’d be five metres tall, and I’d have a laser-guided rotten-tomato-catapult on my shoulder. I’d have rockets in my boots so I could fly, a water jet on my back so I could swim underwater and an invisibility cloak so I could go anywhere I wanted without being spotted. I’d be bulletproof, heatproof and soundproof. Oh, I’d need a hatch for Gnasher to get in so he could ride with me, and there’d be a giant speaker in my butt so I could play really loud trump noises out of it! Earthquake!
What would you do if you had Bananaman’s powers for a day? Con age 8
Dennis says: Great question, Con! First I’d use banana-vision to look round the corner to make sure the coast was clear, then I’d use banana-strength to pick up Bash Street School! Then I’d fly it to the top of Mount Beano and leave it there! Then I’d use banana-speed to get back to town before anyone noticed I was gone – and finally I’d change back to being Dennis! A super way to get a whole day off school!
Do you ever get told off for things you haven’t done because of your reputation as the ‘Greatest Menace’ ever? Hag age 11
Dennis says: I do get blamed for things I haven’t done, but I also get away with a lot more that I have!
If there was one thing you could stop Gnasher eating, what would it be? Con age 8
Dennis says: I’d stop him eating my mum’s vegetarian sausages, because they make him trump! I’m not sure if they have the same effect on Mum…
If you had a party – what four people would you invite from Beano Town and why? Hag age 11
Dennis says: Does Gnasher count as people? He’s definitely coming, even if he does gnash all the sausages! Then I’d invite Billy Whizz, because he can run at Whizz speed to get us more grub when Gnasher’s full! And I’d better invite Minnie the Minx because she’ll be after me with her boxing gloves on if I don’t. And fourth… I would invite all the Bash Street Kids, because you can’t have a party with just four people!
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